Texan Tourettes

Now every state, has its quirky charms
But bein’ born in mine, won’t save you from harm
“How y’all doin’?”, is the seminal phrase
and the deep fried cheese, wins lots of praise
you wanna be polite, down where I come from
cuz we all got a 44, as a side arm
and you don’t mess with us, cuz here everything’s bigger
from the size of our waists, to our hand cannon triggers


Now the way I talk, seems to raise eyebrows
From a Texas chainsaw, to my weddin’ vows
You seem a little big, to be playin’ this game
Bu’cha sure got a pretty mouth, just the same


You know I like the Phillies, and I like to place bets
But people seem to laugh, at my Texan Tourettes
You say you're a steer, but I don’t see no horns
You say you like the cowboys, and Hollywood porn
Down here we see different, we ain’t meek like a mouse
God fearin Christians, with the occasional whorehouse
Don’t go makin trouble now, don’t make a fuss
Cus momma don’t like it, if you swear and cuss


Don’t mess with Texas, we’re the lone star state
3 ex presidents, all section 8s
something ‘bout being born here, what the brain can’t forget
comes out when least expected, my Texan Tourettes
Texas has four seasons, drought-flood-blizzard-twister
And if dumb was dirt, you’d cover ‘bout an acre mister
Now that Sarahh Palinn, she’d make a hornet look cuddly
She’d make a freight train take a dirt road, her morals’r so ugly